TSA-Approved Pet Travel Luggage

Dog is fucking hilarious. 

This is what I returned home to after being away for a good portion of the afternoon:

No, I didn't leave the top unsecured.

Yes, that is Dog managing to get her head stuck trying to escape her TSA-approved pet travel luggage.

No, Dog wasn't panicking whatsoever.

Yes, Dog had succeeded once before escaping her TSA-approved pet travel luggage in the same fashion.

Dog:  "Nothing to see here, folks, move along..."

Me:  "You're fucking hilarious, Dog."

Dog:  "You're such a dick. I hate you so much."

Me:  "Would you like a hand there?"

Dog:  "No, no, I'm cool. It's like a sunroof. I'm awesome."

Look What I Found

Dog:  "Look what I found outside."

Me:  "That's nice. Leave it out there."

Dog:  "But I found it. It's mine. I must bring it inside to protect it from being abducted by other dogs."

Me:  "It's a fucking stick. There's millions of them out there."

Dog:  "Yeah, but this one is mine. Therefore, special and irreplaceable."

Me:  "I don't want it in here because you're going to splinter it to a zillion pieces and I'll have to vacuum it up and then pick wooden splinters out of my feet."

Dog:  "...So that's a yes, then?"

Me:  "I hate you so much."