Dog took a shit on the rug. SHE SHIT ON THE RUG. It should be physically impossible, as in defying the laws of physics, for poop so big to come out of a dog so small. She nearly poops her own mass. Physically impossible. Yesterday, she pooped a sphere. Yes, a spherical shaped ball of poo. But back to the matter at hand, sometime during the night, Dog poo'ed on my favorite rug.
Me: "Why the fuck did you poo on the rug, dog?"
Dog: "Because the rug was more grass-like than the hardwood floors?"
Me: "I hate you so much sometimes."
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