Me: Dog, I can see you. The camera's still on. What is your bed doing in there?
Dog: What bed? I know not what you speak of...
Me: You're dragging it out of my sight right in front of me, Dog.
Dog: What? What bed, asshole?
Me: Dog, I see you again. Take your bed back out to the living room.
Dog: What. The. Shit. How are you doing that???
Dog: Fine. Back out to the living room. This is close enough, right?
Me: Why can't you just be a good dog and listen to me? I hate you so much.
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