Skype Dog

Me:  Hey Dog, how the hell are you?

Dog:  Hey! What's up, asshole? Where the fuck have you been?

Dog:  Wait, more importantly, what the fuck are you doing inside that laptop?

Dog:  Seriously, you're freaking me out. How the fuck did you get in there?
Holy shit, I'M in there, too! How the fuck did I get in there? 

How can I be in there, and at the same time, here...

Me:  Hey Dog, I can't hear you. Move closer to the mike.

Can you hear me now?

Dog:  Wait a second, you're just being a dick. But I'm still so confused... 

How I can be in two places at once... 

Maybe if I rotate my head clockwise even farther...

Me:  You're so ridiculously stupid-cute when you do that.

Dog:  What the shit? Did you see that? The door just closed! 

All this is freaking me out, man... And you're still a dick.